Only In Your Dreams
by Leaena Cedarthorn
Summary: Jane's having trouble trusting her memory of those bygone days... Normality is hard to find when one is attacked by the past... (Chapter 2 up!)
1. Memory Block

Chapter 1: Memory Block  
  
(i can't get the html tags to work so things that should be italic are in *lil staries* like that!) Please review, my second chapter is in progress...)  
  
Mist, Haze, Silver, Will. Then it was gone, blocked from her view. A huge barrier stood there, she banged hard again and again with tightly clenched fists, but to no avail.  
  
Jane sat up sweating profusely and breathing hard. She felt as if she had been smacked with a cricket bat, and her head felt like a lump of goo with nails in. She looked at her husband sleeping peacefully next to her and wondered aloud, running her hands through her sweat soaked hair. "Who is he? Why do I get these dreams night after night? Is there something I don't know about him, that maybe I used to know?" Answers were not to be found in the still air of the spring night. "It feels like there's a block on my memories, I wouldn't forget, I don't forget things, I mean I remember everything, even when I first met Will and those little fantasy adventures we had, both in Cornwall and Wales."  
  
*But were they fantasy?* A voice stirred unknown memories at the back of her mind. *There's something about Will. You have been made to forget. Five fingers splayed out in front of him. Another voice, deep, mellow comforting and friendly - Only in their dreams...*  
  
I give up, she thought mentally. I'll think when I'm more awake and when I don't feel like I've been hit by a bus!  
  
Jane went back to sleep, determined to explore these strange, often meaningless dreams some other time. 


	2. Normality?

Chapter 2: Normality?  
  
The sun peeked its cheeky head round the curtains and shone down on the now sleeping Jane and her husband Will. Slowly they both awoke as the sun's intensity grew stronger. Will sat up, pushed the duvet back and strode over to the window. He was tall (6"0') and well built, with a serious face that had yet to age, but was showing imminent signs of the early forties. He slid back the curtains and looked down onto the bustling Cornish holiday street, which was getting ready for a busy day.  
  
There was an air of power surrounding Will, which was very strange. and also He also emanated a strong feeling of mystery and secrets. He was however, very open with his views and feelings, especially those of love towards his dear Jane and their wonderful children, Katrina and Nick, now 16 and 14 respectively.  
  
"Morning Will" said Jane, and Will replied whilst in deep thought, perhaps of his dreams. Jane looked puzzled and wondered if he knew that she'd had difficulty sleeping last night, or perhaps if he'd had similar troubled, puzzling dreams. But then again, he had looked peaceful last night when she woke from her dreams.  
  
Although Will's air of power was formidable and merciless, it was not bad or evil, in fact, quite the opposite. He was good, on the side of the Light, fighting for true justice, yet not one of those 'eco-warriors' you keep hearing about on TV! No, there wasn't anything strange about him, not that you would see if you only glanced at him, not even if you stared hard. Jane had thought that maybe you could only see it if you looked at him without looking at him, which would reveal all.  
  
Jane slid out of bed, groaned at the growing pain in her head and slipped into the shower as Will dressed, shaved and went to get the children up.  
  
The clatter and batter of kitchen plates soon diverted Jane's attention away from her mysterious dreams as she busied her self making egg and bacon, a special treat for the kids, (even though they were both teenagers now, she thought to herself). "Gosh, doesn't time fly when you're having fun!" she remarked to Nick as he stumbled in, half asleep in his pjs, which were now getting too small.  
  
"Mornin' Mum, can I have extra bacon please? Its real yummy!" he exclaimed unusually brightly, "Oh and also can I have bacon sarnies in my lunch, with ketchup?"  
  
"Yes dear, here's your breakfast, and do you want extra sandwiches for football after school?"  
  
"Yeah, and can you also get me some new football boots, if you're going to town today? Mine are pinching terribly and I've got blisters from them!"  
  
"It also looks like you need new pyjamas, you're growing so fast! Jane joked cheerfully. "You'll nearly be as tall as your father!"  
  
*Ah this is what I need, a nice dose of normality!* She thought soothingly as Katrina pranced into the room, tying her school tie hastily.  
  
"Gotta run Mum, I'll miss the bus!" she said, panicking about her state of her hair in the bathroom mirror across the hall.  
  
"No dear, its only 8:00, you've still got half an hour yet!"  
  
"What? Oh dear, I need to stop guessing the time!" she gasped breathlessly. "I smelt breakfast, and thought "Oh no! I'm going to be late!""  
  
"No, no, its my fault, I just wanted to get a special breakfast, but I had to start it earlier, and I'm guessing it threw you off the time!" she reassured Katrina. "Dear, dear, we are a bunch of owls! I blame your father, before I married him I could easily get up on time, but now, well, *cough cough*, I have just as much trouble as him!" she winked as Katrina gasped in mock shock!  
  
"Mother! Well, if I'd have known, you cheeky, cheeky, well, you!" Katrina laughed at her mock astonishment, whilst stuffing egg and bacon into her mouth.  
  
*Yes, yes, normality that's the thing!* Jane thought blissfully as if this eased her dreams into a mere blemish, and looked forward to another peaceful, normal, day.  
  
*~*~*  
  
After seeing the 'teenagers' (really must find another name for them, she thought!) on to the school bus, and Will off to work, she bustled round the house doing cleaning, ironing and other things to try and take her mind off things, before she set out for work.  
  
Yet even though she tried to immerse herself in normality, those weird dream images just kept sliding to the surface of her brain, and rearing up as if a warhorse was lashing out with deadly hooves at a foe. The dream images themselves didn't seem scary, but the thoughts they provoked still scared her. She didn't know why, but she felt scared for Will, as if, one day, he would go away to somewhere where she could not follow. It felt far off, but close enough to worry her deeply.  
  
"There's something he is not telling me!" Jane jumped, aghast at her outburst, and suddenly sorrowful for the secret that he kept from her. She had often thought that if you loved somebody, you had no secrets from them, and they had none from you. She certainly didn't have any from Will, and she had never felt before that he had any secrets from her, but this outburst challenged that deeply. She sank to the hard, cold floor in the kitchen clutching her head.  
  
"I knew once!" she exclaimed, "I knew his secret! I knew it when I was younger, when we had those adventures!" she continued with the belief restored that Will was truly a good, kind and gentle man. "My dreams.. were about that, that secret!" Jane squeaked with joy at knowledge that she truly knew everything about Will, and he truly loved her, even if, at this moment she was not conscious of his deepest secret.  
  
"What about those adventures we had? I'm sure, absolutely sure, it had something to do with his secret!" Jane blinked as she listened to what her mouth was saying, completely separate, it seemed to her, to the rational, sane part of her mind. "There's something about Will. I have been made to forget." she repeated parrot fashion.  
  
"EEEKK!! Is this normality?" she screamed, then grabbed her coat and bag, and ran out of the door to her car. 


End file.
